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Much too often I found myself stuck. Stuck in situations that no matter how hard I tried, no matter how logical I was, there was no resolution. Have you ever been in that position? I tried everything in my tool box of knowledge, the knowledge of my support team and the support of family business associations. I repeatedly asked there must be an answer to this. Why is it so difficult? Why doesn’t anyone I know of or my support team know of have the answer?

On my journey to find out what all of these people were missing I came across a course of essentials for family business. The first thing I heard was, “You are not alone.” What? This is the beginning statement that was made in this six session webinar series?

Are all of the attendees participating in this course all stuck too? Do they all feel the same way that I do? Feeling alone in the struggle?

After completing the course and trying to apply what I learned, I continued to experience the same, I was still stuck!

So what was I missing? What were all of these family business students missing?

It has taken 8 years to get it. I know that most people have not gotten it and don’t realize that it is available for most of us.

If you have finally had enough of the struggle, contact me now. Do not wait. I have learned that pain is inevitable and that struggling is optional! Yes, optional!!! You and your family are worth it. So, stop the suffering, contact me now.

The majority of family businesses do not create a proper succession plan that includes a total buy in by all stakeholders. Having the right facilitator is key here. The facilitator should have the right credentials to deal with the soft issues that, if not dealt with, will derail the future of the family business! So choose your facilitator well.

Please click the link below:

“http://www.youtube.com/embed/XJ2mAQnEHis?rel=0″

Have you ever wondered why you can’t seem to get to the next level in profits or why certain relationships rarely improve with your best efforts? Have you struggled and suffered through events and circumstances that you believe are out of your control? I certainly have and so do all of the family business peers that I have communicated with.
I will highlight some of the barriers and a plan that you can follow to successfully increase your profits and improve your relationships:

1) As human beings we have certain beliefs and thoughts that we maintain consciously or unconsciously. These beliefs are ingrained in our minds through various sources from the time we are conceived. Some beliefs are associated with money. What we have heard and felt about money has a direct relationship to how much wealth we create for ourselves. For example, if any family member such as your parents every stated, “That millionaire made it off our backs and robbed us poor folks blind.” If any negative comments were made, consciously or unconsciously, you are likely to sabotage your abilities to be wealthy. Deep down, you don’t want to become who you don’t like. If you cherished and admired millionaires, you will have a better chance at not sabotaging your ability to becoming one of them.

This is the first step in moving towards increased profits, your mindset.

2) The next step is believing that it can be accomplished. That also means silencing the negative conversations in your head and those who work with you. One of the best ways to do so is to draw up a step by step plan with mini goals.

3) Set a realistic goal with a date. Then work backwards on how you will reach that goal. Each step must have a date and a number or fact that will be achieved. The mind works best with numbers and facts.

4) Celebrate each and every step that you reach. This will help reduce the negative mind “Frick.” The positive effect of celebrating your wins is priceless.

5) When you stumble forward, yes stumble forward, recommit to the next goal and keep up the momentum. Stumbling is part of the journey forward. The most successful entrepreneurs clearly understood that and never gave up.

6) While on this journey understand that you are not alone and that each of us, as human beings, have our own minds to work with. By utilizing common goals, commitments to each other, believing that we have abilities beyond our wildest dreams, and learn to understand and accept each other, anything is possible.

7) Give up your story. Yes, give up your story. As human beings, we are great story creators. We give meaning to everything that happens and justify why. Once we start to realize what we are doing in our minds and just be present, the impossible now becomes possible.

Make your intensions known and be true to your intentions. By stating what your intentions are and allowing others to be your guide, other people will likely feel more committed.

9) Be a stand for what you know to be right. Being a stand does not mean to be stubborn but to be open to challenges. No person should die by an idea or truth. Just look at what happened in 9/11. How many truths changed in one day?

10) Enjoy the ride!

If you have any questions or would like to communicate with me, please click on the contact button above. Thank you for reading this blog, I would love to hear from you.

For me and nearly everyone I talk to, we all struggle through something. All my life I tried to find the answer for relief. I hate struggling, the pain and usually what results in a loss of some kind. I hate not knowing and not finding the person with the answer. Do we just give up? What am I doing wrong? Why is it so difficult? Why is it that no one seems to have the answers?

Well, consider the following:

1) we are human and we all have a blind spot.
2) There are things we know that we do not know and there are things that we don’t know that we don’t know.
3) As human beings, we tend to think that independence is the highest level of maturity. It is not. It is interdependence. A level where we acknowledge our strengths and search others to utilize their strengths.
4) As human beings part of our brain works to keep us safe and small. That part of our brain is also linked to our emotions. So every time we experience some pain and suffering, this part of the brain is involved.
5) Many of us humans are left brain thinking or use logic. Have you noticed that logic and common sense is not common and doesn’t seem to work most of the time?
6) Human beings are addictive creatures. We can be addicted to alcohol, drugs, drama, being a victim, sex and so many other things. Have you noticed that when someone who has an addiction denies it and is totally oblivious to what is really going on?
7) We are all conditioned in some way. Our parents, their parents, school, religion, politics, friends, the media and soon have conditioned each one of us in some way consciously or unconsciously.
There is so much going on in the world and we are hit with millions of messages that our operating system knocks out the majority of this information so to be able to process it. So it is obvious that the right information may be easily missed!

So what are the right questions to get relief and what we really want? By the way, once we learn more about ourselves and have more knowledge, what we want may change!

Now, the right questions to ask.

First, do you acknowledge and understand each of the points raised? If so, you may wish to consider having a conversation with the right people who are living the life you crave and that care about others. This way you have a better chance of exposing your blind spot.

Second, break down the problem or what is causing the suffering into what is apparent and what are the potential root causes of the suffering. Remember, what is apparent is very likely not the root cause.

Third, admit any inauthenticities that you bring to the situation or problem. This will give you the openings or clearings to allow for a resolution to appear.

Fourth, brainstorm solutions to the real problem until you get that feeling in your gut that the solution is the best one. Make sure that if you are communicating with another person, that they know it is O.K. to be totally honest and O.K. if they hurt your feelings. It is very good to get someone who will challenge you and have little interest in stroking your ego.

Now you are ready to ask the right questions. If you have any questions, need to discuss this or have any comments, please click on the Contact Me tab. I look forward to your reply.

In every family business there is conflict. Each individual is different with differing beliefs, wants, needs, attitudes and dreams. There are many roads that can be taken to the very likely differing destination or result that each family member wants. So, conflict is inevitable.

Conflict usually results in some kind of pain that some or all of the family members endures. I have witnessed families endure some of the most rediculous and sometimes illegal experiences that would make the soap operas and movies seem much more tame.

Have you experienced any conflict in your business? Is it painful? Does it result in something good or positive? Have you ever wondered if there is a better way?

In attended a conference where a group of lawyers were sharing their experience regarding conflict and family business. One of the speakers spoke about the results he was getting utilizing his training as a lawyer for the families that he served. He stated that no one ever really won, that relationships fell apart, that pain was felt by all in one way or another, that there usually was a large financial burden placed on family assets and that this weighed heavily on him and his partners. He then drew a line on the board with 100% control on the left and 0% control on the right. On the right is a judge, in the middle is arbitration and mediation. By the time a judge has to make the decision, the costs are well over $1,500,000.00. What is worse, most judges do not really understand business so no one really knows what the decision will be.

Before a case gets to a judge, there is discovery. I have spoken to a number of families that their legal bills totalled $1,000,000.00 and by the time they completed discovery, each side had spent over $1,000,000.00.

Arbitration and Mediation both are expensive and end up with no one getting what they wanted in the first place. Each side gives up something and no one is really happy.

This seems to be all that everyone knows. But there is an answer to resolving conflict that results in less pain and with a better chance in giving all sides what they really want. Can you believe that this system
gives the family business the greatest opportunity to come up with the most effective solution?

What is it? Facilitation! Hiring the proper facilitator, who understands family business and the industry, can position the family to have the greatest positive result. That result includes Harmony! This is the alternative that each family business must utilize to flourish. This alternative will likely cost much less financially and emotionally.

For more information, contact me now.

Based on my studies, by far the majority of families in business do very little to ensure the longevity of their family business. Of the few that do something, the majority of them are unaware that they can actually be more effective. These few families that seek help rarely find the right help and support.

In my situation, I searched for and communicated with every professional family business organization I could find. I spoke to many professionals, accountants, lawyers, tax advisors, insurers, consultants, and anyone who might be able to help our family. Our family hired the best we could find. Yet, the family relationship fell apart.

I asked myself, “What were we missing?”

For the last 8 years I searched, studied and applied what I had learned. “What is it that I had learned,” you may ask? “Where did you find it? Do we have to take 8 years to learn it too? Will this information and training work for me and our family business?”

I read a book written by Stephen Covey, “Seven Habits of Highly Successful People.” A statement in the book is key for all individuals and families. The statement is as follows: The highest level of maturity is not independence, it is intradependence. That is, each of us have a gift(s). To maximize our potential and happiness, we must seek out and utilize other peoples gifts and strengths. Take a look at the most successful leaders. Study what happened to Ford when he stood in front of Congress in the early years. Congress asked him all sorts of difficult questions trying to find out why he was so successful. They were looking for some wrong doing. His answer was simple, “I don’t know that, I hire other people who know that!”

Well, this brings me to you. There is a reason why you are reading this article. This is your opportunity to get what you are missing! I want you to get it fast, easier, with less pain. I want you and your family to experience bliss, as my immediate family does now. Is the reason why you are working so hard and risk so much for the health and wealth of your family? There is a saying that I truly believe in, “Pain is inevitable but suffering is optional!” Stop the suffering and access bliss for yourself, your family and those you care for.

Take the next step and contact me now!

I am so excited for you, Robert Melo

A number of my mentors have been asked this question. The reply I get is, “predicting the future.” Most entrepreneurs seek the comfort of know what is coming. They also seek control. Without knowing what is coming, their fears and anxiety set in. It is very difficult to predict the exact future but it is possible to be close.

Are you interested in knowing or having a better idea in predicting the future? I sure do.

What does it take to have better predictions of the future? From what I understand, consider the following:

1) Understanding and accepting what is. Total acceptance of what is true without any bias is the start. Any bias will cloud what is and thus the probable right prediction will likely be faulty.

2) Being a generalist. It is easy to focus on one area and ignore all other areas. By being a good or great generalist, there is a much better ability to predict the future. Otherwise, focusing on one area, the odds are great that you can be blindsided.

3) Ability to challenge beliefs. If you do not continually challenge all of your beliefs, the odds again that you will be blindsided is high. For example, there were numerous truths that changed in one hour on September 11, 2001.

4) Continual networking, studying, understanding and applying new information. In order to better predict, you have to be a sponge for knowledge and apply the knowledge that works. Networking may help insure that you are able to see your blind side, help you decide what will likely work and then you are in a better position to make a good prediction.

5) Being present. In order to be aware of what is true and what is, you have to be present. Being in your mind clouds what is going on in the world. This is no easy task. Most of us are locked up in conversations with ourselves. Our mind has it’s own agenda. The ability for you to recognize and consider what is really going on in the world without the bias of you mind takes some dedicated personal development.
(I have had 8 years of personal development myself. Before the personal development a professional mentioned to me that I was “light years ahead of the people I loved.” Well, now, I must be in another galaxy. I highly recommend that every human being continually learns and learns about themselves. It is soooo rewarding!)

I recommend working with at least one other person who has all of the above. Please contact me if you have any questions or would like to have a conversation regarding this subject. Also, consider working with me. I have a vast amount of experience and follow all of the recommendations that have been written in this article.

Click on the Contact Me tab for comments and questions. I look forward to your response.

Going through life without having someone watch over your back side or blind side has been truly painful for me. For most of my life and many people I have spoken with, we were unaware of the following:

1) as human beings we have a blind side.
2) we can find people who really care and understand human nature. (And yes, they do want to help!).
3) everyone has a hidden agenda!
4) each person creates his or her own world.
5) we create meaning in everything.
6) we create our own story about every experience.
7) two people can see the same thing and see something different regarding the exact same event.
common sense is not common.
9) logic is not the best or effective tool to use in most cases dealing with people.
10) there is so much we don’t know that we don’t know.
11) there are higher levels of consciousness.
12) human beings are addictive creatures.
13) as human beings we tend to play the game of making ourselves right and usually find ourselves unhappy.

What I have learned to do is the following:

1) surround myself with caring, giving people with different strengths who have a thirst for knowledge and practice what they learned.
2) I practice number 1 myself and give of myself unconditionally.
3) I always challenge my beliefs.
4) I always search for the possibility in any situation and with any person.
5) I ask myself, what the lesson here is.
6) I take responsibility for all of my actions. With that responsibility I am able to respond!
7) I choose to learn each and every moment.
I learn to be present and get out of my head. I have learned that there is a part of me taking me away from so many potentially blissful moments
or simply getting it.
9) I choose to let go of the past to avoid the suffering associated with it and so that it does not contaminate everyone I care for.
10) giving up the judgements, jumping to conclusions, and the story to simply listen from the heart.
11) listen twice as much as I talk. This is huge! Relationships can definitely grow just by simply listening. Try it. In my situation, things really improved.

Well, I can go on and on. There are so many golden nuggets here. All you have to do is find them. Contact me if you have any comments or questions.

I believe that you need someone who has lived through some of the toughest situations in a very successful family business. I believe you need someone who continually searches and applies the most effective solutions available. I believe you need someone who cares just as much as you do in attaining your ultimate goal, someone who will do what it takes! I believe this person must be flexible, passionate, compassionate, inventive, knowledgeable, connected, and driven.

I believe you deserve that person. I would be honoured to be that person who makes the difference for you and your family. Now its time to make the call. Stop the struggling right now!

Family Business Structures

Family Business Structures

This video will assist you in understanding the different structures in a family business.